


mayday mayhem

by frogeyecircle



Series: breathe, you've got this! [2]
Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: F/F, at least to a lightweight like me that cries after a sip of spiked punch, no beta we die like men, unealthy amounts of alcohol
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-01-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:08:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22112359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frogeyecircle/pseuds/frogeyecircle
Summary: Despite popular belief, Gowonhassome guts.Not a lot, but she's doing her best. She's got an Olivia Hye to impress, after all.
Relationships: Park Chaewon | Go Won/Son Hyejoo | Olivia Hye
Series: breathe, you've got this! [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1495856
Comments: 2
Kudos: 56





	mayday mayhem

**Author's Note:**

> hiiii i'm impulse-posting this otherwise it will sit in my fic folder forever. it's a lil bit more dialogue-centered since they're a bit more chaotic

Fueled by only the power of her determination, Gowon barrels through.

It didn't matter that she had to drop out of high school – she still entered university thanks to her special circumstances, and she decided that she wouldn't let anyone walk all over her just because she's tiny and baby-faced. She did her paperwork, alone; got the money, alone, and moved in the dorm, climbing the four floors lifting heavy cardboard boxes, _alone_ , since her family didn't want to help anymore. And, well.

She didn't need them anyways. Gowon could rely on herself only. Sure, she doesn't know how to cook but 7/11 exists, and she's smart and athletic; one has to be if they want to dance professionally. She considers her unassuming appearance to be an advantage – the dance teacher made sure to train her until her steps were light like a butterfly, so she could just flip around, show her steady strength and surprise the audience with something even more grandiose than arabesques, fouettés, grand jetés. Being on stage with that confidence oozing through was so freeing, so different than that distant time where she felt like a carefully put together doll, one who you shouldn't touch because she'd come apart at the seams.

Gowon lets herself be loud, be irritated, be arrogant; Yves tells her she has every right to be, and her life changes when she understands that she's allowed to reach for her dreams and love herself.

So she lives. Dances, travels, works, goes out for drinks at their usual live house – even though she's not used to alcohol the way the other dance crew members are. Hell, even _Choerry_ handles her liqueur better than her: tonight, that girl knocked back her shots without even wincing, like it was water. The funniest part? Even drunk, she was still good at dancing, complete opposite of Yves and Chuu whose popping 'choreography' was turning more and more ridiculous. That hammer dance was the funniest thing Gowon had ever witnessed in her entire life.

Until they couldn't move anymore and Gowon had to carry them all the way back from the uni's entrance to to the dorm and up the four floors, their dead weights burning pain in her shoulders. Which, sure, that can happen, and she's not going to leave them behind in that state, because she's a good person and an even better friend. But she would have liked for them to be awake enough to let her reach for her card key; she's not even sure how she got out of the taxi with them clinging to her like that. Chuu hugs Gowon in a vice-like grip, Yves slumped over her shoulder like a potato bag, and Gowon has been standing in front of the door for over five minutes, trying to clear her fuzzy thoughts, wondering if she should just climb back in the common room, pass out on the couch for the night. Her legs are wobbly, though, and her head movements sluggish. She glances over her shoulder, at the intimidating staircase plunged into darkness because the lights sensor is off, and grimaces at the idea of falling down, their three bodies stumbling and knocking together until every bone they have is broken.

Her thoughts are even more scrambled up when she shifts again for attempt #57 to get her card key, and Yves breathes into her ear while Chuu nuzzles into her neck and, okay, _no_. Getting involved with the most notorious lesbian players of the town isn't part of her plans for now, so in her head Gowon pray-yells at every deity she knows for help.

The deity, it appears, is Olivia Hye.

“How long have you been standing here,” she says, half-laughing as she opens the door. Gowon could cry just seeing her; her strength abandons her and she slumps forward, Olivia receiving all three of them in her spread arms with a quiet _oof_. “Whoa, easy there.”

“Oh my god, thank you,” Gowon sniffles into her T-shirt. She smells fruity, probably out of the shower recently. “My legs are killing me.”

Olivia moves slightly to the left, slings Yves' arm around her shoulder while eyeing Gowon up and down. “Are you drunk?”

She shakes her head no and gets dizzy; Olivia just purses her lips at her, half-amused and half-frowning.

“Let's get you guys into bed then. You holding up?”

Gowon just nods, tightening her grip on Chuu. It takes forever to shuffle to her room, the older girl nodding on and off consciousness, and she has to awkwardly pat Chuu's butt to retrieve the key.

“Thank you, babyyyy,” Chuu mumbles when Gowon sits her on the bed. “I can take care of myself now,” she says, then immediately drops down on her side, snoring lightly. Gowon just blinks, surprised, before sighing – removes the girl's beige coat and boots, and charges her phone like a good friend. Which she is. They owe her, seriously. They'll figure the rest in the morning. Thank the heavens that this is a weekend.

Back in the hallway, Olivia's faint voice echoes softly from Yves' room. Gowon pushes the door slightly ajar and peeks through the gap. Yves lays on her bed, one hand gripping the headboard as if it was going to escape, while Olivia rummages through the minifridge by the desk. She shows Gowon the single bottle of water there.

“She said she used the last of her groceries yesterday,” Olivia says, scoffing. “But I saw her making heaps of fried rice this morning and I can't find it.”

“No idea. Yeojin probably ate it,” Gowon lies, knowing damn well _she_ was the one to finish the fried rice. She hands Olivia a tablet of painkillers. “Here, just give her some of these and go back to bed. I'll take care of them.”

Olivia chuckles, low and soft. “It's okay, I wasn't even sleeping to begin with. And you look like you could use some help, right now.”

From the bed, Yves snickers. Gowon can only glare at her, heart beating wildly. _Stay quiet, you asshole._ “It's unlike you to drink yourself into oblivion, Yves,” she says. “What's wrong with you?”

Yves shrugs. “Just one of those days. I'm okay, you guys can leave. I'll see you in the morning, Gowon,” Yves says, sitting abruptly, smirking as though she's got a right to be cocky now. “Remember the third rule.”

 _Don't pine like an idiot,_ _Gowon._ “Yeah,” she says dryly. “Let's go, Olivia.”

Olivia only quirks an eyebrow at her, clasping her hand as she closes the door. She's wearing simple shorts and a T-shirt, hair tied into a ponytail, but Gowon saw her the morning before, wearing her business casual outfit as she left for her part-time job; the fact she looks equally good in both styles is frustrating to Gowon. She'd like to breathe sometimes.

Olivia swings their arms back and forth, like she doesn't care about Gowon's sweaty hands. “What was that all about?” The pace to Gowon's room is unhurried, not that she's complaining. Shy Gowon is out. Died two years ago. New Gowon is ready to live her hoe life.

 _Snort_. Yeah, _right_. As if it was that easy.

“Yves is just…” A dozen words come to mind. Nosy. _Meddling_. Thinks Gowon can't take care of herself. “You know,” she says, vaguely. “She thinks I won't psychoanalyze her if she teases me on the things I'm sensitive about.”

Olivia hums. “Does it work?”

“Sort of,” Gowon sighs, opting for the partial truth. “She knows my weaknesses.”

“That you're a sore loser at Mario Kart?”

Gowon chuckles, shoves her lightly. “Shut it. You're just a cheater.”

“You pouted for two weeks straight after you lost last time.”

“Oh, because tickling someone right as they're about to win isn't cheating? You're the blue shell in life, you know that?”

“You always have a comeback ready for everything,” Olivia says, poking Gowon's side. “I can't imagine her bothering you this much. Yves is nice to you only.”

“I ordered a drink and she insulted my loopy straw.”

“Ah. Fuck her, then. Loopy straws are awesome,” Olivia grins.

“Thank you,” Gowon lets a frustrated sigh. “You get me. You're the only bitch I ever respected in this house.”

“Same. I'll join you, one of those days,” Olivia says. “To protect you from Yves bullying you.”

“Hey, no, she's not that bad.” Gowon protests weakly. “Besides, you can't come.”

“Why not?” The girl shrugs, looking to the side until her gaze settles on Gowon's door. “Choerry comes with you and nobody says a thing. Maybe I want to see you wild.”

“We drink alcohol, Olivia. That's what we do.”

“Yeah I noticed,” the dark-haired girl snarks, in a way that makes Gowon's heart jump out of her chest with half-panic, half-gay-panic. “No offense, but you _stink_.”

“You can't even sip at a beer without wincing anyway,” Gowon says. “And– _hey!_ Is that any way to talk to your upperclassman?”

Olivia just smiles; again, it makes Gowon's heart flutter, helpless. Her vision is still fuzzy at the edges; under the lighting, with her slightly damp hair and oversized shirt, Olivia looks even more adorable than usual. It'd be so easy to reach out, cup her cheek and kiss her – give in to her urges – but – but – but every time she sees that smile. She just. Freezes.

“Alcohol is definitely overrated,” Olivia says. “I was even looking forward to it too… As in, after a hard day of work, like a reward of something. But it tastes like punishment instead. I don't know why you inflict that upon yourself,” she adds, poking Gowon's forehead this time.

“Beer tastes like crap. Anyone who says otherwise has Stockholm Syndrome. Some drinks are so sugary you'd think it's juice. It's definitely not something as good as it's advertised to be, though,” Gowon says. “Uni students… Sure, you can have fun, but life isn't all about parties and getting wasted and whatnot. It's not an achievement.”

“Look at you. All wise and all,” Olivia murmurs, and Gowon blinks.

“Oh, I didn't mean to sound judgmental. It's just, I don't know… Sad. That people think you need to drink this much to look… Dare I say it,” she whispers, conspiratorially. “ _Cool_.”

Olivia gasps. “We can't have that, now can we.”

“Never,” Gowon nods. She holds her fist up and Olivia immediately bumps it for their secret handshake. “Dropout pride.”

“Losers forever,” Olivia finishes. “But whatever you say. I was just hoping to dance or something. Or spend more time with you all, since you've all been busy… except for going out.”

Gowon looks down, guilt blooming in her chest. Olivia's right: they didn't hang out together much recently. She used to slip inside her friend's room to play video games all night. Nowadays, the only time they could even sit down and have a chat was during practice, and even that was short, with how hard the teacher was making them dance. She tried to convince herself that it was because everyone got busy with incompatible schedules after their summer camp. Because Olivia started her job at a pretentious, luxury coffee brand shop downtown, because Gowon began to assist Jinsoul in the lab for extra credit.

But the truth is that she's not good with feelings. It shouldn't be so hard to just say three damn words to her, except it _is_.

She glances at their fingers, still interlocked. “Sorry,” is all she can say, quietly.

“Hey, don't be,” Olivia soothes her, voice low and calm. “I don't even like going out too much anyway. I'd rather stay in and play League, you know me.”

“Still.”

“It's okay. I'd like to be invited, though. Doesn't mean I'll say yes, but it's nice to feel included.”

“I'll keep that in mind,” Gowon says.

* * *

She keeps it in mind.

So hard, in fact, that people around her start to notice; Gowon can't blame them. She's either staring at the wall, or staring at her phone facedown, or staring through people like she wants to beat them up; curse her resting bitch face – her brows naturally knit together, so hard she's sure she's gonna end up with a permanent crease on her forehead like Lip.

Heejin assumes it's because she's waiting for a call back from the lab she applied for. Jinsoul and Chuu both barge into her room to worriedly ask her if she's being cyberbullied, Vivi peeking out from the hallway.

And if Vivi is concerned, it's not long until Haseul pulls her into a ' _motherly_ ' hug (when in reality it's more like a really uncomfortable, mortifying ordeal as she will do it anywhere, like the middle of a crowded train. Who does that? _Haseul does_. Someone should really tell her she sucks at being a mom. Actually, scratch that: the fact that she's so good at embarrassing Gowon and being completely oblivious about it means she's full-percent mastered motherhood.)

So the next time they go at the livehouse, she decides to confide Yves, the second designated leader, but even her and the woman's patience has its limits. With today's choice of music being EDM, it runs thin, very thin. And Gowon loves Yves. She really does. She admires her for her ambition and carefree style, the way she lives by the motto of taking what's hers without tiptoeing around. How she balances the art of being detached from everybody but still caring deeply for them. That doesn't mean she's entirely comfortable with their squad leader insulting her inability to confess, under the excuse that Gowon is, in her words, 'just baby'. (Yves is _usually_ good with words. They _hurt_ , okay.)

She frowns. “Yves, drop it. I can't help it.” She takes an ice cube into her mouth and bites down, the fresh crunchy sound the right amount of satisfying. “I'm not making any move. It's boring, yes I know. We've been through that.”

Yves leans back, crossing her arms a bit clumsily – her drinks definitely getting to her. “Look, all I'm saying is, she isn't here and you've been aggressive the entire week. Not to mention you staring at your phone without texting her, not even once.”

Gowon's shoulders stiffen. “Well. Sorry to rain on your parade.” She bites down on another ice cube. “And what about it anyway? It's none of your business.”

“It is my business, you dummy.” Yves snaps, and Gowon looks up at her. Under the dim lights, her eyes are surprisingly bright, a sea of emotions swimming through them. Gowon holds her breath, trying to ready herself to Yves' rare heart-to-hearts. “I'm your _mother_.”

Of course she'd deflate a terse moment with a joke. Despite the irritation beating at her temples, Gowon can't help but quirk an eyebrow, chuckling in disbelief. She pats Yves' hand. “You're my annoying cousin at most and you know it!”

“Guys,” says a husky voice over the droning music. They both look up to see Hyunjin standing in front of their table, holding a very wobbly Choerry against her side. “Sorry to interrupt but I think Choerry isn't feeling too well. I'm gonna sit her there,” she says, pulling a stool.

Several hands carefully maneuvers the girl on the seat, and Choerry slumps forward, hair covering her face.

“You're not gonna throw up, are you?” Gowon asks, already rummaging through her purse for a plastic bag.

“Mmmnooo,” mumbles Choerry. “Just need to rest for a minute.”

“The alcohol finally kicked in, huh. That's a first,” Yves murmurs. “Oh, she's a sleepy drunk. Gowon, watch out for her arm, she's gonna slip and fall.”

“Okay,” Hyunjin says. “I'm gonna go find Jinsoul or Lip so they can take her back to the dorm or something. Text me,” she adds to Gowon, disappearing between the people dancing.

Gowon sighs and brushes Choerry's hair. “How are you gonna hold up? You got class in the morning, right? Why didn't you stay with Yeojin at the dorm?”

Yves tilts her head to the side. “Or with Olivia?” She ignores the murderous glare Gowon sends her across the table. “You usually hang out together.”

Choerry shrugs. “Just wanted to have some fun… I'm working on the week-ends…” She crosses her arms on the table to steady herself, and Gowon can see her closing her eyes. “She's too busy anyway…” With that, she nods off.

Thankfully, she looks like she's balanced enough weight on the table to not fall off the stool, so Gowon relaxes a bit. That is, until she glances over at Yves who signals over to the waiter for a refill.

“Yves,” she says, warning tone in her voice, but Yves make a dismissal noise.

“It's fine. I don't have anything better to do tonight,” she says, and Gowon raises an eyebrow.

“No one-night stands planned?”

Yves grins. “I have better things to do. Like help you ask your date out.”

Gowon rolls her eyes hard. “I know you're just saying that because it gives you thrills to play matchmaker again.”

Yves examines her nails, humming contently. “I'm good at it, you know?”

Gowon snorts. “Yeah, right. Don't throw yourself too many flowers.” She bites on another ice cube. “I also know you regret it. Why tell Haseul to act on her crush when you could've gone after her?”

Yves tilts her head to the side. “Okay, first off, I don't regret it, at all. Sure, Haseul is cute, but I'm sort of a handful and she doesn't deserve that. And Lip was into her since forever. I just wanted to give her a little push, like you oh so desperately need.”

There are no more ice cubes. Gowon frowns into her glass anyways. “You're so stubborn and nosy. I told you I just… I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable.”

“She's far than uncomfortable. She clings to you all the time. And you're just holding back because you're scared,” Yves says. “Didn't I warn you…? The third rule? Worst thing that could happen to you would be to pine like a fool after her. You were the one who said you wanted to live fast and be greedy or egoist…”

Gowon glances down at her hands on the table. In the space between her fingers, she can see how the table's warm metal glimmers with each pulsating light. It's hard to talk back to Yves, because she's _right_. Spot on. And the advice is so redundant because she's heard that and told herself that over and over again. She settles for a shrug, and apparently that agitates Yves even more than whatever she could have answered.

“Gowon, I swear,” she yells over the music. “If you don't confess to Olivia Hye this week–”

“Olivia Hye?”

Choerry's voice cuts in perfectly in time with the beat drop, loud and clear in the silence before cheers and a loud bass fill the live house. Gowon, frozen, manages to turn her head towards Choerry. She almost forgot about her – but here she is, chin propped up against her crossed elbows on the table, an intrigued expression on her face.

“So you like Olivia?”

 _Oh no._ “If you tell her, I will–”

“Relax, I'm not gonna tell anybody. Why would I?” Choerry says, pouting.

“Because you're her friend!” Gowon says, voice increasing in pitch as panic seizes her.

“So what? Yves is her friend as well, she didn't tell her,” Choerry says, shooting Gowon a toothy smile while Yves nods enthusiastically. “I think she's right. You could use someone to help you get together. And I'm _your_ friend, you know?”

Gowon lets the sarcastic _'only when you want to use me for your papers'_ die on her lips, because she's not going to act smart right as Choerry learned her secret. Just as she's about to come up with a less scathing comeback, the waiter finally arrives to refill Yves' glass, and she watches, distracted, the older girl's shaky fingers smooth out a couple bills

“Everyone knows you've got a crush,” says Choerry when he runs to another table. “I just thought it wasn't that serious.”

“She's in for real,” Yves quips. “She saw Olivia screech like a dolphin when we tried to stretch her and Gowon said _'cute'_. Madness, love.”

Choerry leans a bit towards Gowon. “I want the two of you to get together. You'd make a cute couple. Also you gave me your JinE photocard on my birthday even though it's out of print now, so I owe you.”

Gowon is about to protest _'no thank you, I can handle this myself'_ when Jinsoul appears, Lip and Hyunjin follow close behind – all scowling, even Jinsoul; and it's such a scary look on the blonde's face that Gowon is petrified.

“Choerry, we're going home,” Lip says with a tone that won't take no for an answer. To Gowon's horror, Choerry grips the table's edges, and the drinks in their glasses slosh and spill on the surface when Jinsoul pulls at her arm. “ _Now_.”

“Can you even drive?” Choerry slurs out, eyes still trained on Gowon in an unnerving way.

“I can,” Jinsoul hisses. “Because I'm sober. Because I don't drink on _a school day_. Jesus, Yves, you're older than them, you should've stopped her,” she spits, and Gowon gasps, because she vaguely thought it was not normal that Yves was drinking so much and now she feels guilty for enabling her to the point she can't even look up and defending herself. “Be responsible about your shit if you want Vivi's respect.”

“Jinsoul, I think that's enough,” Hyunjin warns.

“And you, Gowon,” Jinsoul adds, pointing an accusing finger at her. “I need you in the lab tomorrow at 9AM. I'll rat your ass out if you're not there on time. Go home.”

“Choerry, come on, let's go,” Lip says.

“Wait,” Yves says. “Drive us back.”

Jinsoul gasps indignantly. “Are you kidding m–”

“Okay,” Hyunjin says quickly. “Let's go.”

The entire car ride is uncomfortable, Jinsoul and Lip clearly glowering with anger in the front seats and Choerry's vodka breath on her skin as the girl burrows into her side, Yves on the other, mumbling something about rides. Gowon tries to gulp down the shame that burns in her throat, thinks that she's glad Olivia Hye wasn't there to witness that.

* * *

The next morning, it rains. Just a small drizzle that refreshes the air a little, but with the dull clouds overhead, everything turns gray, almost white. Gowon wakes up with a minor hangover, and pulls the clothes over her head in careful movements, like she's afraid of hurting herself if she goes faster. She checks her phone to hit snooze on her alarm and grimaces – Olivia sent her a text and she swiped on it by mistake. The girl just asked if she'd like to get breakfast together before her shift, and Gowon sighs. Slowly types out _no sorry_ _i_ _cant, gotta go_ _to_ _the lab_

The reply comes immediately. _oh okay. ill_ _drop you off_ _you there_ _if you want_ _, im_ _outside fixing my bike_

_sure_

She stops by the common room to grab her coat, and by the dorm's entrance she sees Choerry struggling to put one shoe on, bouncing one-legged and holding on to the umbrella rack for dear life.

Gowon quirks an eyebrow at her. “You okay?”

“Noooo, I'm gonna miss my bus,” Choerry whines. “And this shoe won't fit!”

“That's 'cause it's not yours,” Gowon points out. “It's Yeojin's.”

Choerry looks down and groans. “Oh no, not again…”

“Did you seriously not notice they were a size down?” Gowon chuckles as she closes her shoe locker.

Choerry, sat on the tiled floor, puts her own shoes on, scrambling to tie them as fast as possible. “Not really. I was in a hurry, and, well, I was thinking about how to get you and Olivia together.”

Gowon startles. “Uh, yeah, about that–”

“Choerry,” Heejin calls from the common room. “Haseul said you need to take your food from the counter.”

“But I'm gonna miss my buuuuuuusssss–” Choerry cries, removing her shoes and running back into the room.

Gowon sighs and exits. As soon as she opens the door, she's met with the sight of Olivia Hye and an unfamiliar girl sheltering themselves from the slight rain and chatting under the roof of the bicycle parking rack. Olivia leans back on the grid rack with a pleasant smile, and the girl climbs on her bike. Gowon starts walking towards them but then stops altogether when she watches, bemused, as the girl hastily scribbles a number on a scrap of paper. Olivia takes it between her two fingers and does a lesbian salute as the girl pedals away with a wink.

Oh.

 _Oh_.

Clutching her messenger bag tighter, she approaches Olivia, who's twirling the paper with a small smile. “Hey,” she greets. “Olivia.”

“Hm?” Olivia blinks. “Oh, hey. Didn't see you there,” she says, kicking the grid rack to propel herself forward. She flicks at a bicycle's ring, her eyes everywhere but on Gowon, obviously pleased that she's got game, and it makes green-eyed jealousy crawl up Gowon's throat. “I was talking with Somyi. You ready to go?”

“I'll walk,” Gowon snaps at her, and she's about to turn around with a huff when everything explodes around her.

Well, metaphorically. What really happens is that something vaguely purple bumps into her, violently so; she loses her grip on her bag, its contents spilling on the wet ground, and Olivia's hands come to stop her from falling.

“Sorry!!” Choerry yells out, looking behind her shoulder as she full-on sprints after the bus. “I'll treat you to Baskin Robbins!!”

“Choerry, you asshole!” Olivia yells, but Choerry already got in the bus in-extremis, almost slipping down on the last steps. She sighs and bends down to help Gowon pick up her papers. “Are you hurt?”

“No, I'm okay,” Gowon mumbles, stapling some papers together. She glances at her watch – she's gonna be late for sure. “If you see me cooking something for Choerry next time, mind your business.”

Olivia snorts. “Sure,” she says, picking up two slips of paper and turning them over. “Here you go, your… tickets for the fair…?”

Gowon looks up.

“Huh?”

“This is yours, right?” Olivia says, flattening the tickets between her palms. “Oh, they got a bit wet. You're going with anyone?”

Huh?

…

Oh god.

_Choerry._

“I, uh,” Gowon stammers, before coughing into her fist. _Get it together, girl. Make a move_ , _do it_ , yells her inner Yves-ah Labeouf. “Actually, let's go together! I wanted to ask you.” She'll beat Choerry's flat ass later.

Olivia's triangle-shaped lips curl into a smile, telling her the answer, and it brightens Gowon's entire day, even if it started crappy; even Jinsoul chuckles in disbelief when she enters the lab, erasing her name from the late list.

Fair day is going to be great.


End file.
